Update

DH had a very bad time with post surgical pain last night. I have never seen him deal with so much pain.

Today he had an appointment with the nurse practitioner that works for our primary care physician. The outcome was that DH has to return to psychological therapy. Right now I am waiting for the therapist to call back and say she will see him after such a long absence. I expressed the urgency. I hope she really understands it.

This morning DH thanked me for helping him through the pain episode. That was a first. He usually doesn't say thank you for anything. He was brought up to know what things he is supposed to do and not to expect any (and I do mean ANY) recognition for what he has done. What a miserable childhood!

I am doing better. No more wanting to run away, but the idea is still tempting.

Please continue to pray for all dementia patients, their caregivers, family and friends.

Is DH loosing his mind or just lying?

DH has been impossible this morning. He claims that he asked twice yesterday evening to drive the Mercury to a sleep study appointment. Initially I had planned to do some shopping while he was "sleeping", but decided to do something else instead. I do not remember him asking for the car at all.

Is he delusional? Is he lying? I don't know, but the day started off with a bang when he got home and started yelling.

I am at work now. I want to run away from home. I don't want to do this any more. I want a day of peace and quiet where I can do the things that need to be done without him constantly yelling, nagging or making disparaging comments.

How am I supposed to hold down a full time job and do things around the house with this kind of atmosphere? I have my own health problems and when they flare up is the time DH always acts the worse. It is like he has to have the attention while I am the one who needs the peace. I wish my mother was still alive. I could cry on her shoulder for hours right now.

Have you ever wanted to do something but you didn't have the proper tools for the project? Last night I wanted to paint the inside of the hall closet. I am in the process of changing it from a clothes closet to a pantry. I found the paint. I had old newspapers to cover the floor. All I could find was a 1" paint brush. Do you have any idea how long it takes to paint the three walls of a 36X24 closet? I was at the task for almost three hours. The wallboard had never been painted since the house was built and soaked up so much paint that you could hear it sighing with relief. This morning it looks good. But to have the pleasure of a task done well was taken from me by a man who only cares about his self and it is destroying me.

I have no support group; no friends who care about me and the rest of my family is totally in denial. Now where do I go?

Please pray for me. I really need it bad. Thank you, K

Toilet Update

I got home from work last night so tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open.

The toilet water had dropped down to a good level. By gravity? DH says that he did not dip out any water. However, the container that we have used in the past was next to the toiled. Strange how things happen but DH denies them.

Now to a three day weekend. Hope that I can control my temper and get some things done around the house.

Please keep praying.

Bleach

We have a clogged toilet. Not an exciting piece of news. I have been trying to fix it with a plumber's snake and plunger. Last night I started working on it again and surprise it had some type of bleach product in it. DH claims that he didn't put anything in the toilet. Well, I don't believe him.

Tonight I will try to dip out all of the fluid and start over with gloves on. If this doesn't work I will have to call the plumber again. How much fun.

We have an appointment coming up with the dementia doctor. This will be on my list of things to talk about. DH still claims that he does not have dementia. I am going to suggest that he stop taking the Namenda. We will see what the doctor has to say about this.

Keep praying for all of us. We need it!

Thank you

The comment on the previous blog was a much needed reminder. As spouse and caregiver it is very easy to get angry at DH when the symptoms of his illnes frustrate me. Another blogger suggested I go into a different room and count to 10 or 100 or what ever I need so that I can be supportive when my DH needs help.

Thank you dear friend.

DH was up to his old tricks last night. The was a movie that I wanted to watch and he said he had already seen it and didn't want to watch it. I really wanted to see it and didn't change the TV channel. DH got angry and stomped out of the living room and went to bed. That was fine with me. I read until 1:45 am and then went to bed. This morning I am exhausted, but working as best I can. Before I left for work I told DH that if it happened in the future I would leave the living room and watch what I wanted on a different TV. This kills three birds with one stone. 1) I get to watch what I want. 2) He cannot get angry with me and flounce out of the living room. 3) I won't get angry at him by exiting the room and watching the program of my choice. This is the best of all worlds. We are both in a win/win situation. Why oh why didn't I think of this before?????

Please continue to pray for all dementia patients, their families, friends and caregivers. I really need it and I know that they do too.

Here we go again

I use this blog to keep track of my DH dementia symptoms. It seems we are starting down that slippery slope again. Last night he was having problems signing on to the internet with his computer. He has to connect via Sprint before starting Internet Explorer, but he wanted to do it the opposite way. He insisted that it was the correct way and he had always done it so.

My difficulty is not reacting with love, understanding and compassion. I get so experated with him that my voice starts yelling when my heart and mind tell me not to. What a visicous circle.

Please continue to pray for all dementia patients.

Oh Dear and Alas

When talking to DH a week ago we were discussing the inheritance that I got from my father after he passed away. We used the money to purchase a new furnace, replace the shingles on the roof of the house and garage and to buy a security system. DH did not remember anything about the inheritance or how we had paid for these things.

Then yesterday DH told me that when he got home from visiting his mom the locks on the front door were different. We have gotten in the habit of locking them a different way in the last few months and they were locked the opposite of our current method. Then he could not find a special key that he had in his wallet, carefully placed so that it couldn't fall out. Oh dear, here we go again. Not a good thing.

Otherwise he is alert and aware. He does not appear to be having any major memory problems. That is God's blessing.

Please continue to pray for all dementia patients, their caregivers, family and friends.